The Different Kinds of Facebook Users

With social media we have essentially created a new culture, and with every new culture comes sub-cultures. We all don’t use Facebook the same way, the same as we don’t all do the same things for fun or share the same interests. Your friend list is more diverse than you’ve probably realized. See if you have a friend that fits into a certain “type” or find out if you’re a type.

1) The Energizer Bunny

You know how Stephen King is called the most prolific writer ever, since he seems to come out with a new book every week? Well, the Bunny could give him a run for his money, because the sheer volume of stuff they write on Facebook any given day could be turned into a novel. If you’re friends with one, you’re guaranteed to get an updated status from them every five minutes, whether or not anything interesting has happened to them in the last five minutes, with constant comments on your status, comments on any and all pictures, and invitations for a variety of groups and events. If you’re a patient person you might not mind it. If you’re like me, you wonder why you should care what your friend’s lunch was like. You figure they have to sleep sometimes…you just don’t know when that is.

2) The Drama Queen

I’m not being sexist here, a Drama Queen can easily be a man, but the phrase Drama King might be confusing. The Drama Queen shares a lot of similarities with the Bunny, since they both write quite a bit, but where the Bunny talks about everything, only one topic interests the Drama Queen: how horrible their life currently is. The topics will vary from a crappy job, a mean boss, the latest heartbreak, a bad friend, a tough course load, a mean teacher, or anything else that will get your sympathy. They usually have very little interest in you, and will rarely acknowledge you on Facebook unless you’re trying to upset their monarchy. Your status is about your bad day? Well, that doesn’t even compare to the day the Drama Queen had, which they will outline for you, in minute detail, in your comment section. Expect a lot of vague phrases and references in their updates, just begging you to get sucked in.

3) The Gamer

Most of us like Farmville. It’s fun and addictive. Most of us don’t play Farmville like it’s our job. If the strawberries wilt or the cows don’t get milked, life goes on. Not so for the Gamer. The fictional world is just as important, if not more important, than the real world, and it’s their responsibility to keep it in top shape. In most situations, having the Gamer for a friend wouldn’t effect you, but since it’s Facebook, you’ll become involved somehow. While the Bunny offers a new update every five minutes, the Gamer offers you a reward every five minutes for a game you don’t play, and might never have heard of. It’s not like they stick to one game either. You are just as likely to receive a lost chicken as a box full of grenades from them. After a while you don’t so much want to play the game as delete the friend.

4) The Ghost

If you know the Ghost, you probably wonder why they are even on Facebook. If they have a status, it’s likely to stay the same for months. Their wall is like a deserted building, with maybe only the occasional friend request accepted weeks a part. Their profile picture has been the same for years and barely even looks like them anymore. The most action their account receives is when you wish them a happy birthday, which they will thank you for, a couple of months before their next birthday. For the most part you will forget they’re even one of your contacts, until they make a rare trip out of their void and give you a thumbs up.

5) The Photographer

If you’re friends with the Photographer and hang out with them in real life, you are far more likely to be tagged in a ridiculous amount of photos. They’re the people that bring a camera to every get together, no matter how mundane, and make you and your friends pose until they get the absolutely most perfect shot. Everything must be chronicled for future generations. Getting a drink? Smile! Greeting a friend? Hold that pose! Choking on a chip? That one’s a keeper! You’ll be tempted to break their precious camera, but look on the bright side: you’ll eventually get a cute picture for your profile.

6) The Family Member

We thought it was cute when our mom joined Facebook. We thought it was less cute when our mom commented on that picture of us passed out on a lawn. You have to add the Family Member, because, you know…blood or something. But with their addition comes a nervous panic over what someone posts on your wall. How much information do you want your family to have? And there’s nothing more embarrassing then when the Family Member uses Facebook to treat you like a child, or remind you of a funny/mortifying story from your past.

So what type of Facebook user are you?